ay_my_lord

*he very well might* But do you know what I thought? I thought it would be so nice, if they found some way to make him go. I told Laertes -- I told him to stay away from dad. But I thought it would be so nice. I thought, my uncle's a bastard, but he's right, grieving has to end. You can't live life with the dead always in it. If dad went on to where the dead belong, if dad could let go, then so could I ... but I know he's not a peace, and I know that he won't be, and that's why everything's so hard. I owe him. I don't want to be prince, I don't want to be king, but don't I owe it to dad to try? I don't want to stay here, but don't I owe it to dad, to take care of mom when he's gone? I don't want to kill. I don't want to. Dad said if I loved him, I'd do what he said. My uncle's wrong ... when you love someone, grieving doesn't end ... it becomes less, but something's always absent, always aching ... but what if I don't love dad? I don't want to do what he said, and I let myself think it would be better if he was gone ...